


with the roar of the fire my heart rose

by ezwra



Series: Your Hand In Mine, So Still and Discrete [FREEWOOD] [5]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Drinking, First Kiss, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:35:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24888451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ezwra/pseuds/ezwra
Summary: Oh, it's not tonightWhere you hold me tightLight a fire brightOh, let it blaze, alrightwould that i - hozier
Relationships: Gavin Free/Ryan Haywood
Series: Your Hand In Mine, So Still and Discrete [FREEWOOD] [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1499378
Kudos: 23





	with the roar of the fire my heart rose

**Author's Note:**

> THIS WORK IS BASED SOLELY OFF OF FANDOM REFERENCES AND CHARACTERISATIONS. I am writing this to rt/ah guidelines as best as I know them. I do not know of their in video personas as I havent watched regularly since 2014. These are characters based on / referencing real people, but are not those people.
> 
> got a request for their first kiss and finally got around to doing it - unedited because i just finished and dont wanna start hating while editing

Recovery is slow and painful and, honestly, ryan would prefer it if he didn't have to do this every time he got shot or sliced up or burned.

Or, some odd combination of the three.

Right now, he’s trying to fight his way out of bed while no one else is in the room. He’s been on bed rest for a week trying to fight off the infection, taking more and more medication which only leaves him weak and restless and anxious about… something. The days have kind of blurred together into one, too, and his memory is hazy. 

Ryan gets his feet on the floor and sighs out, sweat on his brow. It’s honestly  _ embarrassing _ , being in such a state and so  _ weak _ when he’s meant to be the vagabond, their strongest ally, their tank. He’s broken necks with his bare hands and severed spines with a well-placed knife, and yet he can barely stand.

He pushes himself up off of the bed and stays steady for a few moments, legs shaking slightly. The bedroom door opens and gavin steps through, but when he sees ryan his mouth opens to shout. Ryan forces himself to step forwards and cover gavin’s mouth with his hands, stumbling slightly before catching himself as he presses the smaller man against the door to slam it shut.

“Don't,” ryan wheezes, frowning heavily with big eyes as he looks down at gavin, “don't call jack, she’ll kill me.”

Gavin stares up at him with a shocked expression, eyes dancing around wildly before he settles and nods slowly. Ryan gives him a stern look (as stern as he can be, anyway, as sweaty and weak as he is) before removing his hand slowly and placing it on gavin’s shoulder instead, resting his head on the other one with a quiet, “thank you.” Gavin’s hands settle on his sides and he shudders under the gentle touch, frowning softly before sighing out, “m’sick of being stuck in that bed, just want to… wanted to get on my feet again.”

“You just had to ask,” gavin says softly, his mouth close to ryan’s ear, “i would have helped you, rye-bread.”

Ryan nods slowly, sighing shakily. As the seconds pass, gavin ends up supporting more and more of ryan’s weight until, shamefully, he says, “i need to… need to sit down,” and starts to sink to his knees.

“Oh,” gavin’s eyes go wide as he follows ryan down, “oh, okay, right then, let’s just- yeah. Let’s sit here for a bit, love.” he settles onto the floor and carefully helps ryan down, something hesitant and scared in the way he touches ryan.

Ryan lays his head against gavin’s abdomen and sighs out shakily, heart racing a little. He settles his hand over the bandage under his shirt and frowns at the uncomfortable heat radiating from it, closing his eyes.

“You should be more careful, love,” gavin says, carding his hands through ryan’s sweat-damp hair, “can't have you collapsing like this when no one else is around, now, can we?”

Ryan laughs weakly, more of a quiet wheeze, and shrugs his shoulders tiredly, opening one of his eyes and looking up at gavin, “worth it…”

Gavin blushes a little before grinning, sighing out as he gently touches along ryan’s jaw, “sure it was, rye-bread.”

They stay like that for a while, and ryan will swear that he was just catching his breath if asked about it later, but he presses himself closer to gavin and dozes lightly.

\--

After another week he’s got slightly more strength in his body. Ryan gets increasingly restless with each passing day, especially when the fever leaves and he’s just tired and sore. 

He’s in the bathroom now, peeling the gauze pad from his abdomen. The white fabric is completely clean and the wound is no longer red and inflamed. The dark tissue is still tender and aches with every wrong movement, but when ryan takes a deep breath he can sigh it out without any twinge or flinch.

Ryan presses a fresh bandage down and smooths out the sticky parts before turning the light off and returning back to the bedroom. Its the middle of the night but cars are still driving around the city, headlights occasionally casting the room in a white light. Ryan’s shadow stretches across the floor and up the wall to the ceiling, almost haunting in how it shifts and wavers with the changing lights.

Sighing, ryan sits on the bed and holds his head, elbows resting on his knees. His hair hangs loosely around his head and tickles the skin of his arms, he has to restrain a flinch at the sensation.

Eventually he lays back and stares up at the ceiling, grabbing his phone from the bedside table and holding it above his face. The screen is too bright but he welcomes the ache behind his eyes, keeping his eyes open as he flicks through apps before sighing once more. 

He can't sleep, he’s not hungry, and nothing on tv is entertaining right now.

Ryan stands and grabs an old, pulling the soft material on over his head and pushing his arms through the sleeves. He walks out into the hall and passes by some closed doors. Stepping into the living room and turning on the light, he freezes when he comes across gavin standing in the adjoining kitchen.

“Oh,” gavin smiles tiredly, raising his brows, “you’re up. I thought you were sleeping.”

Ryan shrugs gently, “couldn't sleep.”

“Same here.” gavin turns around and continues cleaning a mug in the sink, humming softly, “where are you off to?”

Ryan shrugs, then realises gavin can't see it and runs a hand through his hair, “nowhere really, just… just getting restless. Wanted to go for a drive, maybe.”   


Gavin turns off the faucet and sets the mug on the drying rack, shaking his hands dry, “well…” ryan watches as he turns around and steps closer, but he doesn't look up, “a new gas station just opened up near chumash beach, maybe we could get them to, y’know, choose their alliances.” he looks up and gives a mischievous grin, and ryan’s heart stutters in his chest.

“That sounds amazing.”

\--

The drive up is in silence, but they don't need to talk. Gavin’s driving while ryan cleans and loads the guns that were in the glovebox. The adrenaline is already beginning to set in, just the  _ thought _ of finally being able to cause some chaos lighting up the blood in his veins.

Gavin has a bright grin on his face that only grows as they get closer to Chumash; once they park, ocean wind blowing through the open top of the car, ryan presses a handgun into gavin’s hand before opening his door and climbing out, sand blowing across the parking lot and stinging on his toes a little. They’re cold in the open air, but the sensation is refreshing.

“I have no clue why you decided  _ sliders _ were a good choice for a robbery,” gavin says, grinning as he stands and climbs over his door.

“They match my outfit, and i'm all about style,” ryan grins as he kicks a leg up, showing his stained and ratty sweatpants. He reaches down and grabs his own gun from the seat, sliding it into his hoodie pocket, “i don't think i could tie shoelaces right now, anyway.”

“I could do it for you, idiot.”

Ryan walks towards the gas station and gavin skips along to catch up, “as funny it would be to see you on your knees in front of me, i'm not going to make you do that.”

Ryan almost regrets the joke immediately after he says it, but he just pushes the door to the gas station open and tries to forget about how gavin’s blush retreats down under his shirt.

They peruse the aisles together for a few minutes - gavin grabs a bottle of cheap spirit, something clear and probably blinding in large quantities, and a pack of mints. Ryan doesn't bother grabbing anything, instead running his thumbnail along the scratches on the grip of his gun. He just follows gavin around and occasionally tightens the grip on his gun in anticipation.

“Right then,” gavin says, smiling up at ryan, “you ready, love?”

Ryan nods and grins a little, “ready.”

Gavin walks up to the counter where a young woman is sat flicking through her phone. “Excuse me, love,” he says, smiling when she looks up. She stands and immediately starts bagging up their items.

“Anything else you need?” 

Gavin hems and haws for a moment, crossing his arms and tapping his chin, “well, maybe,” ryan draws his gun and points it at the woman, her eyes going wide, “could you put the money in the bag with everything else?”

She looks between them both before stepping away, “i-i…” she looks at the staff exit before giving in and beginning to shovel the money into the plastic bags.

Ryan’s heart is racing and he almost feels  _ childish _ for enjoying this. It’s a small crime, the LSPD probably wont even come down to investigate, but being here and doing it with gavin feels like he’s sixteen again in georgia.

She eventually finishes, and gavin swings the bag off the counter with a chirpy  _ thank you! _ before walking to the exit. Ryan keeps the gun on her for a few more moments before leaving, following gavin and breaking into a jog to catch up.

Gavin doesn't go to the car, instead he walks past the cluster of houses and onto the beach, shiny shoes swiftly covered in clumps of sand. Ryan follows with a grin, tilting his head as he watches gavin’s silhouette in the darkness.

Eventually, ryan grins before speeding up and wrapping his arms around gavin’s midsection, laughing gently at the squawk he lets out. “Thank you,” ryan says against his neck, the tan flesh quickly warming up under his breath. Gavin laughs a little, tilting his head back against ryan’s shoulder and to the side slightly.

“Nothing to thank me for, love,” he croons before stepping away and sitting on the sandy floor, kicking his shoes off and tugging off his socks too. 

Ryan sits carefully, the shopping bag between them, and leans back against his forearm while pressing his other hand to his abdomen. It doesn't hurt much, but the discomfort from leaning and sitting is present in his mind for a few moments.

Gavin fishes the bottle from the plastic bag and quickly cracks the seal, dropping the lid onto the sand and tilting his head back with each pull from the bottle. He manages to drink four or five mouthfuls before pulling the bottle away and coughing, covering his mouth and shuddering.

“Fuck,” he chokes, grinning, “tastes like shit.”

Ryan laughs, taking the bottle from gavin’s limp grasp and sniffing it. He winces before drinking some mouthfuls. It tastes like the first batch of moonshine michael tried to make, and it makes his chest burn. 

“Yeah, thats…” he pulls another face, “thats not great.”

Ryan drinks another mouthful before passing it back, shuddering at the renewed burn. It warms him up a little, cheeks flushing in the cold air, and gavin touches the pale skin on the back of his hand before taking the bottle back. 

They drink in silence for a while. Idly, ryan realises he probably shouldn't be drinking while he’s on painkillers, but he  _ also _ probably shouldn't be robbing gas stations with gavin, so. 

Gavin shifts closer and smiles up at ryan almost nervously, leaning against his body, “kinda cold, huh?”

Ryan grins gently and shrugs, “for bean poles like you, maybe.”

He laughs, but doesn't say anything else. Ryan takes the bottle of alcohol and forces it into the sand until it stands on his own. He scoots gavin closer to keep him warm, hesitating before looping an arm around the younger man’s waist.

From what ryan can see, gavin’s shocked and  _ possibly _ pleasantly surprised. Ryan presses his nose into gavin’s hair and sighs out gently, listening to the ocean. 

Eventually gavin must get restless or bored because he starts fiddling with the hairbands on ryan’s wrist, then pulling them off and sitting up to turn around so they're both face to face.

Ryan raises a brow, watching as gavin reaches past his head to tie the long dirty blonde strands at the top of his head in a messy bun. “Your hair is lovely, rye-bread,” gavin says, playing with some of the strands that escaped his loose grip, “all shiny and soft…”

Ryan leans into the touch, heart racing. Suddenly he understands what gavin means when he talks about liquid courage.

He doesn't act on it, but the urge to reach out and touch gavin, grasp his shirt and pull him close and never let go, is  _ suffocating _ .

Gavin trails his hand along the tender skin behind ryan’s ear and he shudders, closing his eyes slowly. His hands come forward more, thumbs stroking his cheekbones before shifting down and along his mouth. Gavin’s thumbs are soft and gentle, and ryan opens his eyes slowly to look at gavin.

“You’re beautiful,” gavin murmurs, eyes lidded. His pupils are dilated and ryan idly remembers that fact about the size of your pupils and seeing someone you love, wonders if his own pupils are in a similar state. He blushes brighter and looks away, sinking his fingers into the sand.

“M’not a mirror, gav,” he jokes, almost licking his lips until he remembers where gavin’s thumbs are.

“No,” gavin says, eyes flickering down to ryan’s lips before he shifts closer until his warm breath fans over ryan’s face, “you’re not.”

The kiss is slow, almost tender. Ryan’s mind races a mile a minute but his mouth can barely keep up with gavin’s, delayed with each movement. Gavin’s hands are warm on his face and the liquor is warm in his stomach and everything about this moment is so perfect. His mind eventually catches up and he settles a hand on gavin’s hip, biting on the other man’s lower lip before he pulls away, burying his nose in gavin’s neck and laughing gently.

He can feel gavin huff a soft laugh above him, and that warmth in ryan’s heart only grows.

**Author's Note:**

> if you want to request anything send some prompts to @ezwra on tumblr, and maybe give this work a reblog if you would like? :^)
> 
> love you lots! <3


End file.
